Just Thinking

just to say I love you...So I am almost done with the auction, just waiting for a few more checks to arrive and a few people to contact me.  It amazes me that people would bid but not have intentions of paying or that their would actually be complaining about a product or service they received in exchange for a winning bid; when this was a charity event; but you know some people are never satisfied.  I get to start helping Molly Bear's by more then donation and actually make bears in your memory! I am so excited about this and Brigit and Tamberly are so thoughtful they want your name to be attached to the bears I make.  Which is very nice because I am doing this in your honor, just like I did the donations and auction.  And as a mommy to an angel it is nice to have that recognized!  It has been a long week with me being sick and not feeling 100% plus slightly moody because your angel date of the 12th is approaching, then the 23rd (you would be 11 months) and then your birthday, your daddy's birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas!  Oh dear how I am dreading all of these...how am I going to get us all through this...together I assume is all that matters! I just keep thinking to myself once I pass these monumental dates that something is going to change, as if a magic trick or something, but in my heart I know different....I guess it is just the victory of making it through them...not saying that we will make it through them without any knicks or scratches but I know the Lord will bring us though it.  Which is also another bitter sweet thing, knowing the Lord will provide a way to the other side of this but the harsh reality that we are about to embark these dates without you being with us when they are about you too!  I suppose all those times I heard growing "Life isn't fair" is nothing lass then truth!  And to be quit honest I am not sure the bible says "life is fair" either but rather the Lord will hold me up at His righteous right hand and that he leads me beside still waters...Sophee I know you know how much I loved you, my hope is the rest of the world would know my love for you too and that, that love would make a difference in someone's life! Blessings to you and Jesus sweet girl...Blessings