Friday, December 9, 2011

a quick post...

I wanted to post something real quick for those who had left ugly messages my last blog...I  hope that you who said you weren't reading any more actually is something another mom who lost her daughter posted today...You don’t know how I feel; please don’t tell me that you do.
There’s just one way to know–have you lost a child too?
“You’ll have another child” – must I hear this every day?
Can I get another mother, too, if mine should pass away?
Don’t say it was “God’s will” – that’s not the God I know.
Would God, on purpose, break my heart,
then watch as my tears flow?
You have an angel in heaven – a precious child above.
But tell me, to whom here on earth shall I give this love?
“Aren’t you better yet?” Is that what I heard you say?
No! A part of my heart aches and I’ll always feel some pain.
You think that silence is kind, but it hurts me even more.
I want to talk about my child who has gone through death’s door.
Don’t say these things to me, although you do mean well.
They do not take my pain away; I must go through this hell.
I will get better, slow but sure – and it helps to have you near.
But a simple “I’m sorry you lost your child” is all I need to hear.

I have more to post later...including some sites of what not to say to greiving parents, the fact that my feelings are my feelings and for those who constantly walk around offending me with their words I usually keep my mouth shut but sometimes I just can't...I could have responded to my ugly messager last week who has a toddler...well lets send your daughter to heaven and tell you you you need to heal at "god speed"! I also want to share a devotion that was sent to me becasue this person had commented on how I had said about wanting for people to gift in Sophee's name, or start a tradition in her honor...a godly woman has asked the same 13 years ago!  I am not crazy...and I guess that is why I am typing this becasue I had taken the last couple of weeks off from facebook and my blog, questioning myself over and over had the things I had said been offensive and hurtful and should I apologize....I am not crazy or have I done anything wrong for missing my Sophee and wanting and wishing and praying! That these two people in particular were offering me tough love...I don't need tough love right now, I need real friends who offer unconditional love! But one of these girls I actually thought was a wonderful friend so I pondered and prayed about her words...but the Lord did not impress any of what she said on my heart as with that said I also have a place in my heart for grace and giving forgiveness.... My little brother and sister turn 7 today and I have to shower for their birthday party until I return later...have a blessed day ...Sophee I love you, Jesus I praise you! Blessings~


Rebekah said...

{{{HUGS}}} That's all I have to say. Love you.

Anonymous said...

Summer,:::hugs::: i cannot even imagine how you must feel. Although God does not wish for any of us to be ill or die, He does use the situation for his glory. I can tell just from reading your blogs and facebook posts that indeed God has done a work in you. He was shown you strength and love and I so admire you for it. Noone can expect you to heal immediately but know that God loves you oh so very much and His arms will always be wrapped around you and I'm positive he is taking great care of Sophee. You are in my prayers always, - Erin (LV2BEPRINCESSES CRAFTS)

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